by Steve Adubato, PhD

I was recently speaking to a top level executive in a major insurance company. His organization was about to be merged with another insurance company and the new management was looking to make some tough decisions as to who would stay and who would go.

When I spoke to my client, Jim Smith, I asked him what his greatest strengths were as an executive. He said; “I’m fair and I am a great team player…oh yeah, and I can make tough decisions.” In our coaching session, I followed up by asking Jim if he had any concrete examples to demonstrate his point. There was a long pause and he finally said, you know, Steve, that’s hard to do on the spot. I am going to have to get back to you on that.

Funny, there is a good chance that Jim is going to be on a very tough interview over the next few months, because there is only one person needed to perform his responsibilities. Simply put, Jim’s ability to communicate as well as to “brand” himself are more critical than ever before, yet, at 62-years-old, and as strong as Jim is in his current job, he feels more anxiety and less confidence than you could imagine.

In our session, he also said; “I really don’t feel comfortable selling or promoting myself.” Part of the problem for many professionals is that they look at confident communication, laced with concrete examples that drive home who they are and what they do, as “promoting or selling” themselves. That’s a mistake. For many, it is a genuine response, but for others, it is a way of hiding behind the need to communicate in a much more clear and relevant fashion. It sounds innocuous to say that you don’t want to sell or promote yourself, but it’s not. Instead, reframe that statement in this fashion; “It is important for the person on the receiving end of my communication to understand my strengths, so they know how helpful I can be to their organization.”

Just saying you are a “team player” or “fair” is not relevant to the receiver of your communication. Those terms are abstract. Anyone could use them, but until the recipient of your communication truly understands what your words mean to them, you are not connecting. You are communicating, you are giving out information, but you are definitely not reaching them on a deeper, more visceral, level.

Further, when it comes to a job search, particularly for older professionals whose organizations have merged, changed, downsized or whatever, these issues become particularly relevant. Consider the following communication tools and tips that will help you “sell yourself” in a fashion that will not only build your professional brand, but also help others understand why you are important to them.