Being A Charismatic Communicator by Steve Adubato, Ph.D.

Many people connect charisma to communication. The Greek root of charisma is ‘kharis,’ which simply means grace. We often refer to prominent leaders of yesterday and today who were charismatic and in turn perceived as great communicators – John F. Kennedy, Martin Luther King Jr., Ronald Reagan and more recently U.S. Senator Barack Obama. These charismatic figures attract attention. You’re drawn to them. They have a certain presence that makes what they say and how they say it significant.

In the corporate world, former Chrysler head Lee Iacocca was seen as a charismatic communicator. So was Carly Fiorina, former chairman and CEO of Hewlett-Packard. Tiger Woods is charismatic, even when he is not communicating.

We incorrectly assume that charisma is something that only a select group of people are born with - a gift that in turn makes these people extraordinary communicators. The problem with this thinking is that it ignores the countless leaders in all walks of life who are extremely charismatic but don’t fit the above described mold. Gandhi was charismatic and so was Winston Churchill. Neither was particularly physically attractive or had a commanding presence. They were not great speakers or communicators in the classic sense. What they DID have, however, and what many lesser known charismatic leaders possess, is a set of qualities that allows them to move and motivate others in a deep and powerful way. Some questions about charisma are in order:

Q—What is the essence of charisma?

A—It really comes down to confidence and being comfortable with yourself. It’s not necessarily about sex appeal, but rather human appeal. The more confident and comfortable you are the more others are drawn to you. This confidence and comfort level comes from truly knowing and believing in yourself as a person and the message you are communicating. Think about it. When parents talk about their children, they are animated, passionate and clear. They are “charismatic” communicators. They are comfortable with themselves and their cause – their children.

Q—So you are saying anyone is capable of being a charismatic communicator?

A—Absolutely. To assume otherwise is to aspire to mediocrity - believing that you haven’t been given these natural gifts or talent of others. Being charismatic is not like being a professional athlete. Some people can practice every day but don’t possess the natural ability to be an elite athletic performer. With charisma, it doesn’t matter how big or small you are or whether you are a man or a woman. All that matters is that others believe that you believe deeply. Charisma comes in all shapes and sizes, but there is no mistaking when you are in its presence.

Q—What are some of the communication traits of a charismatic leader?

A—When you are introduced to speak, don’t rush up to the podium and start talking before you’ve planted yourself, looked directly to your audience and decided exactly how you are going to begin. Charismatic communicators are comfortable with the sound of silence. They use pausing to let their message sink in and create anticipation in the minds and hearts of their audience. They stand tall but not rigid. They speak not from a scripted text, but rather in a conversational style from a bulleted outline. Their body language matches their words because both are genuine. Anyone can acquire these communication traits when they are comfortable and confident. There is no excuse for you not to be as charismatic communicator as humanly possible. You don’t have to be George Clooney or Oprah Winfrey, you just have to be YOU. Once you achieve that, anything is possible.

Dr. Steve Adubato coaches and speaks on the subjects of communication and leadership and is the author of the book "Speak from the Heart." Write to him at The Star-Ledger, 1 Star-Ledger Plaza, Newark, NJ 07102, or click here to contact him through this web site.