Emptying the Communication Mailbag by Steve Adubato, Ph.D.

Let’s empty the communication mailbag to begin the New Year. We received lots of great letters on various communication and leadership questions and issues. Following are just a few.

Q—I very recently have taken an important position with a new company. Every time I get up to speak, I feel I can do a better job of connecting with my audience. Next week I have the opportunity to make a very brief statement to an important audience. Any advice on making sure my first public speaking opportunity leaves a positive impression, especially given the brief time frame?”

A—First, you have to clarify what you mean by “brief time frame.” Is it five minutes or two minutes? It makes a difference. Don’t assume that your definition of brief is the same as those who convened the meeting. Further, since this is the first time you will be speaking to this group, narrow your focus. Your goal is to have the greatest impact in the shortest amount of time. Develop a message statement, a powerful declaration of what needs to be done to address a particular situation your organization is facing. Recommend a specific course of action; “What we need to do is…” Finally, the more customized your comments can be, the better. Make reference to people in the audience and the unique challenges and opportunities the team faces.

Q—My boss seems threatened by me and tries to keep things secret. I am never told what we will be doing from day to day and I am expected to follow him around. He tells me I am an overachiever and that I should be content with being his assistant and to do what I am told. Any advice on handling this micromanager?

A—You should have added “insecure” micromanager boss. Are you stuck in this situation? Is this the person who you will be reporting to for the foreseeable future? If so, your objective is to lessen his anxiety and insecurity about you. Do this by trying to make him look good in front of others. Let him know that you need his help to get a particular job done. Simply put, play to his ego, whether you believe it is worth playing to or not. You need to redirect his focus away from you and then cross your fingers that his superiors recognize these weaknesses and relieve him of his responsibilities. Until then, you are in a tough spot.

Q—Many consultants are asked to provide their services “pro bono” by non-profits or other organizations that do not have the “budget” to bring in an outsider for specific services. What is the best way for the consultant to communicate to the organization that it is not always possible to offer services free of charge?

A—Your goal when communicating to someone who has asked for you to do something for free is to be direct but respectful. If the requesting organization is a non-profit or a charity that you want to help for free, then you should do it if possible. Certain pro-bono work can expose you to other potential paying situations and it is always good to give back.

But in those cases where you know someone can afford to pay but simply tries to take advantage, you need to push a little harder; “Bob, I am really flattered that you’ve asked for my help, but I’m sure you’ll understand that other clients pay for these services. As a professional, it would be unfair for me to do otherwise with you. How valuable is this service to your organization?” Or, turn the tables; “I appreciate your request, but frankly like you, I am running a business. I know that you’re not in the habit of giving away your services and I am sure you will understand that neither am I. How would you like to proceed?”

Dr. Steve Adubato coaches and speaks on the subjects of communication and leadership and is the author of the book "Speak from the Heart." Write to him at The Star-Ledger, 1 Star-Ledger Plaza, Newark, NJ 07102, or click here to contact him through this web site.